mouthy_merc | Entries tagged with nate's place

So, yesterday Deadpool had some funny grey spots. Which, you know, easy to write off as a coloring error. It happens all the time! Like that thing with the Hulk that he's green because the inkers were freakin' laaaaazy.

But now it had spread to more grey spots. Which probably meant something was wrong. Since he had that kooky healing factor and all.

This meant he was going to do the completely reasonable thing and perch on the end of the couch to eat cereal from the box and watch bad television as he waited for Nate to be done getting Jan all cleaned and dressed.

Seriously, how did that kid manage to get dirty while sleeping? It was a secondary mutation. Had to be.

[[For that guy who is more than basic television]]

There were certain things that were distinctly wrong with where Poromon woke up this morning. The fact that is most certainly was not the room of a little girl was a pretty large clue that he was not where he was supposed to be.

Oh, and that random guy n bed with him. That was a hint too.

Awkward

[[for that guy]]

When Wade woke up this morning, he hadn't been exactly expecting a number of things. First and foremost being the small ginger girl sitting at the end of the super large bed, staring at him. So, he did the reasonable thing and stared back.

"I'm hungry," the girl announced.

This could only end badly for the kitchen.

[[For the other guy in bed!]]

So, Nate was still a dog. Which made for awkward conversations about walkies. And good ones about selling Nate's things on E-Bay when he got all Nate-ish at him.

Sucks to be a dog!

"So, you're still all furry," Deadpool said, taking a sip of his delicious coffee. "I gotta say, not into that kinda thing. I mean, sure, Wolvie may have his charms when played by that hunky Aussie, but this is a biiiit much."

[[For the doggy in the window]]

Nodding off during CNN wasn't reeeaally new with Deadpool. Not in the slightest. Because, well, it was boring. Maybe if they were watchin' something fun like Fox News and drinking every time someone mentioned socialism or Nazis...

Oh, Glenn Beck. Cry moar.

But when he had a weird dream about waking up with Vanessa, that was where he was almost sure this was a set up for some kooky flashback issue. Or an attempt to rehash old trauma for fun and profit.

God damn you, Dan Way. Damn you to hell and back again!

So, upon waking to the soothing tones of the Daily Show, it was understandable that he was just a wee bit frowny at this.

[For that guy]

There were certain things that meant it was Sunday morning in this household that Deadpool was a part of only by virtue of having people move into his house when he wasn't there. AGAIN.

Coffee? Check.

Overly sugary cereal? Check.

Small child watching a show about a talking dog? Check.

"Ya know, this isn't even decent for the parents to watch. Can'tcha pick something with more subtle humor that I'll enjoy and have to explain to you when you're older and then you'll be horrified that there was that joke in a beloved childhood show?" Deadpool asked.

Jan gave him a look she probably learned from Cable before turning back to the TV. "My TV time."

She was evil.

[[For the guy who lives there]]

After spending some nice, quality time alone in the woods, Deadpool had decided it was time to come on back to Nate's place. And, you know, check in on stuff.

And things.

Which seemed to mean sneaking in like a ninja. As ya do.

[[For that guy. Apartment modded because I can. I CAN]]

There were some perks to waking up as a seven year old. Boundless energy, super stealth capabilities, water guns suddenly held an interest...

But that also meant he was too short to reach the best cereal. Yes, even if he climbed up on the counter top.

So, there he was. Poking at the idiot in bed to get him up. "I'm huuuungry."

[[For that guy!]]

So, it was snowing.

Hells to the yeah. That meant a snow day from going out and doin' crap like shopping or--shopping. Look, Deadpool really didn't like shopping.

This now meant that Nate wasn't gonna be goin' to work either. Instead he was being used like a pillow slash personal heater on the couch. He was going to enjoy the damn snuggling and take it like a man, okay?

"Just lay back and think of Providence," Deadpool suggested, settling for the fiftieth show on home improvement of the morning.

[[For that guy who is modded there.]]

So. It was that time of year and there was a kid around. That meant Wade needed to teach Jan all the wonders of the saccharine sweet morals on TV this time of the year.

"Now, I was thinkin' of startin' you out with that wimp-ass It's A Wonderful Life where they never gave that guy his comeuppance for losing all their money. Because I'd choke a bitch," He said, fiddling with the DVD player as Jan sat perched on the couch with a very displeased fox in her arms. "Teach him to lose my money with a fist to the face."

Jan just giggled in agreement as someone was being silly.

He thought it best not to mention he totally would punch Jimmy Stewart in the face if he could.

"Not that The Grinch is much better, but... It's a kids classic."

[[For that guy who actually lives there. SP for great justice]]

Everyone else was back to normal and so Wade was biding his time for his return of thumbs. And normal vocal cords. That chick with the laptop just hadta be about to change him back. Right?

Right?

Eh, screw it. He learned how to open the fridge like this. He was set for freakin' life.

[ for the occupant of the apartment ]

Hey, someone was still sleeping off that radio and then the ~~handwaved~~ trip to get pizza and bowling afterwards. Don't judge him for staying in bed so long, man. It was perfectly normal.

And warm.

And--oooo! Pillow stealing!

[[For that guy]]

After a ~~completely handwavey~~ fun trip to the zoo and Jan discovering her insane love for giraffes, Deadpool was more than happy to have a nice, relaxing day in.

By watching cartoons with the kid.

Don't you judge him! It was this or shows about buying property.

[[Up for SP! *clings to library*]]

It was a pretty normal Saturday morning, even if Deadpool was only over that night so he could mock Nate in the morning for being all antsy about teaching his mom.

Seriously, the Summers family was just so messed up.

But that would be when he was more conscious. Right now he just turned into Nate and wrapped an arm around his waist. Odd thing, though, was it felt like someone was doing that to him. Two someones.

Oh, naughty dreams.

[[For that guy and... swords]]

Deadpool had plans and ideas and... okay, he was just really, really in need of sex. Despite having only done that the whole time he was with Nate yesterday. But it was making him try to do stuff with OTHER people now.

Cute, blond, legs and ass and...

A certain mutant messiah to get his ass home NOW. Because now he was ordering porn on the man's cable and that would only end in tears.

"Oooo! Lord of the G-strings!"

[[For that guy! SP is the name of the game.]]

After having a very busy day yesterday with being pretty--oh so pretty--Deadpool had been very glad to flop over and sleep. In someone else's bed.

Details, details.

It's not like Nate took up the whole thing. Most of the time.

Shut up, he could cling in order to find a spot to sleep. "Nate? I think I'm still pretty," He said in lieu of a good morning.

[[For the person in beeed

...and going NWS. LA.]]

The kid was in bed, the animals were all blissfully passed out in a pile somewhere in the corner and Nate... still a lemming.

Business as usual.

Deadpool had commandeered Nate's couch to sleep on because, well, he sure as hell wasn't taking the bed. That would be weird. Never mind how he was passed out with the wee plastic ball that housed a mutant messiah resting on his chest. THAT WAS NORMAL.

REALLY.

[[For the lemming!]]

Deadpool had heard the news. Oh, Deadpool had heard the news.

So he'd done the logical thing to do when you lost a loved one. He bought a shitload of beer. With a child en tow, yes. But that pesky lil' voice--it sounded like Bea, except that it didn't and it sounded like Nate--kept telling him this was a bad idea.

Bastard that he was.

And there was Deadpool, on the couch of Nate's place--he didn't think the lemming would mind--showing Jan episodes of Golden Girls. She's fallen asleep after the third one and was clinging to poor Max like the fox was a doll. Deadpool was really in no better shape.

Tether was staying far away from him lest there be a repeat performance of that weekend he didn't like to talk about and was emo and missed JEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAN.

Instead, he clung to the plastic ball that housed the owner of the home. Shut up. He was grieving.

[[Mostly establishy! R.I.P. Bea, you fine lady you!]]

After some bad TV--Oh, how Deadpool did love that mid-season replacement show with the space cowboy--he made good on his promise to come to Nate's.

Kinda.

He was mostly just glaring at the door to the apartment as if that would be telling him just what to do now. So far, it was a crappy conversationalist.

"I knew I shoulda stuck with a plant."

Deadpool had a mission. A mission that didn't involve black suits, fedoras and sunglasses, nor blues.

...maybe next time.

He was on a mission to get some damn sex. So there he was, waiting around in Nate's bed--grenade free and weapons all carefully put away--and getting bored. Where the hell was a know it all mutant messiah when you need them?

[[For the only guy there.]]